So Dr. appointment yesterday revealed bad news. My FSH is too high to even do IVF (they are doing another test to confirm, but the dr. was pretty clear that the odds were slim). I am devastated. We now have 2 options - donor egg or adoption. I am not sure how I feel about either. With donor egg, I can't help but think that it will be R's baby and not mine...but on the otherhand, I would at least get to experience being pregnant, feeling the baby grow inside me, and giving birth. Would I always feel like it wasn't mine? I have done some research and the testimonials I have read all say that they feel the baby is theirs. I don't know, I have a lot to think about between now and next dr. appointment next week.
Not in the mood to write much - too busy with my pity party...
I'm so sorry. I'm sure that was hard to hear, and even harder to digest. Thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteBlech. That sucks! I hope for you that time will bring some clarity to your choice.
ReplyDeleteIn the meantime, your allowed to have a pity party! Allow yourself to feel whatever you need to for as long as you need to and don't let anyone tell you different.